Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Another Door Closed

I've been spending some time in the backyard flower beds and garden boxes. It is so healing to be out there. These last few weeks have been really rough ones. Another door has slammed shut on my Montessori classroom. It seems we need to have a driveway in order to comply with the township regulations to have any kind of childcare in our home. Alas, we do not have a driveway. It makes no financial sense to add one so I'm back to the drawing board.

I've been praying a lot lately. Asking for guidance. The theme that comes through is TRUST. It is one thing I have a very difficult time obtaining. I am a bit of a control freak. I don't know why. I don't like the idea that I'm not planning my own life. However, it seems none of my plans have worked out very well so I best listen to what I'm being told. I've also had a great deal of difficulty with PATIENCE. I'm a doer by nature and sitting by and waiting for things to happen just isn't my style.

Yet I am being asked, wait. To trust. To have patience.

I am trying to be obedient. It is a very hard road for me. So for now, I am putting away all of my thoughts of Holy Spirit Montessori. If it is meant to be, it will be. I have no ability to control it. What I will do next school year is really up in the air. 

So I will finish out these last two months of my internship, obtain my certification and wait. 

In the meantime my garden is beckoning. I hope to blog more. I have missed it. Perhaps I'll go back to sewing a few things. We cleaned out the sunroom in preparation for some updates and are still planning to do a few of those in the next few months. 

And I'll continue to trust. To trust that the Lord has a plan for me. He didn't make me a worker for naught. How I will work for him over the long term is unknown. I will do the little things I can every day. Love, trust, study and pray.

1 comment:

Life with Luke said...

Oh, Beth, I'm disappointed both for you and myself (a driveway rule??!) I was rather inspired by your Mother's Group presentation and thought HSM sounded like a good fit for us....God bless you as you wait. I love your spring pictures - how lovely things turn out when God does them, as we see in nature, even though they require a whole fall and winter of waiting.

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